You've healed me ..
Completely.
Just a week ago I was in the birthing center awaiting your arrival. My body was working hard to complete your journey of life inside of me. It had seemed so long ago that your daddy and I had found out there was you, followed by a long nine months of carrying you. During those last hours of pregnancy, I was remembering the day I found out that I was going to be having a girl. I was so thrilled at the idea of raising my own daughter and all of the things we would experience together through your own life journey.
My nerves were unhinged. The anticipation, excitement, even the fear and unsureness, were overwhelming to my core being. Tears came when I knew you were entering the world. I wasn't sure what the tears were telling me until I heard your first cries and held you in my arms. They were tears of love. Unconditional love. The most beautiful, purest love I've ever felt for anyone upon laying my eyes upon them for the first time.
There was a moment that you and I shared that I will never be able to erase from my memory. It is by far one of the most precious memories that I will ever make in my life. It was just you and me by ourselves for the very first time. I layed you skin to skin and in that moment you healed me. My heart, mind and soul so content and at peace with life. You took away the ache and sadness, that having even survived postpartum depression and forgiving myself, had left behind. The huge hole in my heart that I felt for never feeling the instant bond and love that a mother feels for her new baby was finally mended.
In those precious moments between you and I, I cried tears of healing. I held and gazed at you and whispered to you my appreciation of you blessing me and praised God for the miracle that your life had brought me.
I hadn't known the hurt and emptiness that I had carried around for so long ..
Until you healed me.
